The Number One Reason Why You Won’t Achieve Your New Year’s Goals

The most powerful goals are those achieved in silence.

Photo by Markus Winkler on Unsplash

When I was younger, I had a tendency to tell everyone all my goals and what I wanted to achieve. I would set ambitious financial, career and work goals. I would put it all over social media and tell all my friends and family.

There is good research that says that when a goal is made public, it is more likely to be achieved.

As the old saying goes:

“if it is made to show, it is made to grow”.

But if you’re like me, you don’t struggle with motivation or discipline with working towards your goal. You’re self-motivated and have a clear direction with where you want to go.

That’s why I’ve decided to keep my goals for 2022 to myself. Not because of a fear of failure or because I am not serious about achieving them. I’ll still make my goals clear and specific to me. I am my biggest fan and worse critic.

But as my goals have gotten bigger or more ambitious, telling other people my goals only attracts unsolicited advice about why or how it won’t work.

When I say I want to start my own business before turning 28, all I hear is:

“You’re too young to start your own business.”

“That’s too risky to do that.”

When I wanted to start speaking to the world via blogs and podcasts, people told me:

“Who would listen to your podcast or pay to read your blog?.”

“There are too many podcasts out there.”

It is tiring to have to sit there and listen to nonsense advice from people who have neither started a business, podcast or blog.

I just keep it all to myself unless someone is really interested.

On keeping your goals silent

When you tell people your goals, you’re implicitly asking for their permission. And if you don’t get their validation, you feel deflated and rejected.

That’s why most of you won’t achieve your New Year’s goals.

If you need other people’s permission to achieve your goals, you’ve already lost. You’re going to encounter inevitable setbacks on your journey and for the most part, you’ll be doing it alone. Get used to it.

Permission is a contract you sign to only achieve your goals if other people allow you to. What a bad deal. You don’t need anyone else’s permission. Only your own. Learn to show up for yourself and no one else.

Give yourself the time, space, and energy to be able to work in silence towards even your most ambitious goals. Use your spare time before and after work and 20% of your time on the weekend to move 1% towards your goals.

Don’t promote it. Don’t even talk about it. When people ask me what I do on the weekends, I just say “working on a few things”. They don’t really care and I don’t have the energy to have to justify myself.

“If you have chosen a simple life, don’t make a show of it. If you want to practice simplicity, do so quietly and for yourself, not for others.” — Epictetus

I get it. Working on your goals can be exciting and fulfilling. You want to use this energy to inspire others to do the same with their life.

“It’s natural that when you find something that really has a positive impact on your life, you also want the same for others,” writes Darius Foroux.

But most of the time, as much as people might feel inspired, many will resent you. You are a reminder of how much their life sucks and how they aren’t doing anything to improve themselves.

In Australia, we have a saying that the “tallest poppy gets cut”. We have an ingrained cultural aversion to ambition and success. At best, it keeps everyone humble and relatable. At worse, it provides an environment sterile to growth.

Growing up in this environment can be tough. But it taught me the power of producing results in silence rather than broadcasting everything I do.

I can enjoy the best of both worlds. I get to enjoy the company of friends and family. While giving me the freedom to work hard on my goals.

Summary:

Working on your goals in silence is liberating.

There are no expectations of you. You give yourself time and freedom to experiment, change course, and iterate.

If you want to change your life, keep things to yourself as much as you can. There’s no need to share everything you‘re doing.

Put in the work and let your results speak for themselves.

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